Quick Hits Headlines

News Roundup for 8/10/11

Ron Paul supporters arrive in Iowa

-Headline of the Day-
“Ron Paul busing 30 family members in to Iowa.”

One of the more entertaining aspects of watching Paulistas is their habit of creating realities that they later celebrate. You’ll check in on a messageboard or a comment thread on Reddit and you’ll see a link to an online poll or something about who’s gonna win what race in what state sometime maybe. All the Paulistas will rush off to totally skew the poll in their direction, then they’ll later point to the poll as proof that RON PAUL IS DEFINITELY GONNA WIN!! They have as good a grasp on the concepts of logic, evidence, and cause and effect as their creationist, global-warming-denier hero. Seriously, when you look at it objectively [ED: get it?], it’s freakin’ hilarious.

Anyway, the latest adventure in manipulating reality so that RON PAUL IS DEFINITELY GONNA WIN comes from the Great Man Himself, Ron Paul. In order to make sure that he comes out near the top in the Iowa straw poll, Ron’s packing up 30 “sons, daughters, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and more” to the Hawkeye State to wander around “wearing their Ron Paul T-shirts” and “their Ron Paul dresses” and probably hats and pants and buttons and tattoos on their foreheads. Then all the Iowans are going to look around and say, “Wow, this Ron Paul guy is just super-popular — I’m gonna hop on that bandwagon! All these people who coincidentally look like Ron Paul can’t be wrong!”

And then Paul wins the Iowa straw poll, which automatically makes him the President of the United States. After that, we all live in a Libertarian paradise — like Somalia.

You ever hear that phrase, “That’s so crazy it just might work?”

Yeah, that’s always bullshit. (Politico)


-Speaking of logic and evidence-
Some miracles just cannot be explained.


Click to embiggen

Clearly, this young man is a prophet. (SMBC)


-Bonus HotD-
“Wis. Dems: The Recalls Were A Win For Us!”

Wisconsin dem chairman Mike Tate: “[How can Walker] claim this is a real victory for him and his agenda, when his party lost two senators on his watch to recall elections? How can that be a win for Scott Walker when he lost two seats?”

Math always seems to hate Republicans as much as Republicans hate math. (Talking Points Memo)