Sarah Palin, Cultural Troll, Strings Out Her 16th Minute of Fame
"Liberals like this? Then I don’t."
I think that pretty much sums up the entirety of Sarah Palin’s political philosophy. She represents the reactionary nature of modern conservatism, where — if it weren’t for the left — she’d have no idea what she stood for. She’s a policy lightweight and she’s fasting in a smorgasbord of information, yet starving for attention.
At her very core, Sarah Palin is what so many rightwing people are — a troll. And that’s why the far right loves her. She is what Ann Coulter was, until Coulter became familiar and boring. These people have the attention span of goldfish and Ann Coulter, once the right’s woman of the future, turned out to be the flavor of the month. Sure, she still sells books, but her days on the covers of magazines are over.
What both Palin and Coulter have learned is that the best way to a wingnut’s heart is through their hatred. If you can piss liberals off, then you’re all right. Policy ideas, actual logical arguments, facts and figures — who needs them? Just say something that liberals will hate and the wingnuts will love you.
Sarah Palin’s participation in the annual Memorial Day parade in Washington, D.C., has fueled as much noise about a potential presidential candidacy as the thousands of motorcycle-riding veterans participating in the Rolling Thunder ride-along Sunday.
At the Pentagon parking lot where the mob of veterans and their families pre-position for the thunderous two-wheeler march down Constitution Ave, Palin, who was not expected to address the Memorial Day crowd, said she was thrilled to participate.
"I love that smell of the emissions," she said, donning sunglasses and a Harley Davidson skullcap-style, black helmet.
Not exhaust, emissions. Why? Because liberals are worried about emissions and, if liberals don’t like something, then that means there should be more of it. Meanwhile, ThinkProgress points out that carbon emissions are at an all time high.
But the future isn’t important. What’s important is giving liberals a hard time. If Palin had been on the Titanic and liberals had been warning of icebergs, Sarah would be boring holes in lifeboats.
Luckily for everyone, Sarah Palin is on her sixteenth minute of fame. Soon, she’ll join other heroes of the right like Ann Coulter and Glenn Beck and Cal Thomas in the bottom of the toy box. The old cliche is true — at least, on the right — and familiarity does breed contempt. Whatever path Palin chooses — doomed presidential campaign or continued Facebook trollery — it’ll be calculated to stretch out her remaining days of fame. And maybe cash in one last time.
There really isn’t anyone home in Sarah Palin. At least, not Sarah Palin the public figure. She’s just a reaction to what happens around her. She’s a voice criticizing decisions made by others, without risking criticism herself by ever advocating an original position. She makes no arguments that are her own, she has no ideas that she didn’t get second-hand, and the policies she defends have other authors. She’s just a rubberband that snaps back in the opposite direction when pulled.
Fortunately — whether she runs or not — we’re probably just about done with Sarah Palin. Unfortunately, bored wingnuts will replace her with another shiny new troll when they’re done with her.