News Roundup for 8/10/11
Ron Paul supporters arrive in Iowa
-Headline of the Day-
“Ron Paul busing 30 family members in to Iowa.”
One of the more entertaining aspects of watching Paulistas is their habit of creating realities that they later celebrate. You’ll check in on a messageboard or a comment thread on Reddit and you’ll see a link to an online poll or something about who’s gonna win what race in what state sometime maybe. All the Paulistas will rush off to totally skew the poll in their direction, then they’ll later point to the poll as proof that RON PAUL IS DEFINITELY GONNA WIN!! They have as good a grasp on the concepts of logic, evidence, and cause and effect as their creationist, global-warming-denier hero. Seriously, when you look at it objectively [ED: get it?], it’s freakin’ hilarious.
Anyway, the latest adventure in manipulating reality so that RON PAUL IS DEFINITELY GONNA WIN comes from the Great Man Himself, Ron Paul. In order to make sure that he comes out near the top in the Iowa straw poll, Ron’s packing up 30 “sons, daughters, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and more” to the Hawkeye State to wander around “wearing their Ron Paul T-shirts” and “their Ron Paul dresses” and probably hats and pants and buttons and tattoos on their foreheads. Then all the Iowans are going to look around and say, “Wow, this Ron Paul guy is just super-popular — I’m gonna hop on that bandwagon! All these people who coincidentally look like Ron Paul can’t be wrong!”
And then Paul wins the Iowa straw poll, which automatically makes him the President of the United States. After that, we all live in a Libertarian paradise — like Somalia.
You ever hear that phrase, “That’s so crazy it just might work?”
Yeah, that’s always bullshit. (Politico)
-Speaking of logic and evidence-
Some miracles just cannot be explained.
Click to embiggen
Clearly, this young man is a prophet. (SMBC)
“Wis. Dems: The Recalls Were A Win For Us!”
Wisconsin dem chairman Mike Tate: “[How can Walker] claim this is a real victory for him and his agenda, when his party lost two senators on his watch to recall elections? How can that be a win for Scott Walker when he lost two seats?”
Math always seems to hate Republicans as much as Republicans hate math. (Talking Points Memo)
Truth? There is No Truth
What the hell is wrong with Republican voters? That’s a question I’ve asked myself again and again and have yet to come up with a satisfying answer. It’s as if reality has no meaning for them and they believe the universe is a big chunk of clay, waiting to be molded into whatever they want it to be. Even history means nothing — just words on a page that can be edited to fit new narratives. We in the reality-based community are stuck in our slavish devotion to perceiving things as they actually are, while conservatives seem to see themselves of free from everything. Everything, that is, but a rigid ideology that runs contrary to most of those pesky facts. Science is the enemy. Math is the enemy. History textbooks are the enemy. The media is the enemy. If it disagrees with the ideology, it is the enemy.
Consider, for example, Minnesota Representative and presidential candidate Michele Bachmann. Despite being a noticeably low-wattage bulb, she’s become a bona fide possibility for the GOP nomination. Public Policy Polling finds that if Sarah Palin doesn’t run, Bachmann “will pretty instantaneously vault to co-front runner status with Mitt Romney, provided she can continue her current momentum” and Gallup reports that she “finds herself in a relatively positive position among Republicans as she begins her formal campaign.”
Granted, most of this polling was done before Bachmann had a rough few days of seemingly constant gaffes, but gaffes are what she does. A combination of serial liar and ignoramus, none of what’s been making headlines for her lately can come as a real surprise to anyone with even a passing familiarity with the woman.
And this is what’s so perplexing to me; despite all her shortcomings, many Republican voters seem to believe she’s flawless. Maybe it’s because she hits all the talk radio buzzwords and talking points, but when Michele Bachmann flubs it, she doesn’t really flub it — reality is the culprit. And it must be corrected.
In light of Bachmann’s latest historical hiccup, people are trying to edit John Quincy Adam’s Wikipedia page to reflect her recent gaffe. One edit, for example, changes his description from “John Adams was the sixth President of the United States” to “John Adams, a founding father, was the sixth President of the United States.”
They did the same for Sarah Palin, editing Paul Revere’s entry to have him firing warning shots and warning the British. When a conservative celebrity blows it, it’s not their fault — history is wrong and must be corrected.
The reasons for this particular insanity are less important than the consequences. Because these lunatics are who we’re supposed to be meeting halfway in any compromise. As I always say, when you meet someone who’s crazy halfway, the results are halfway crazy.
As long as fools like Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann speak for the Republican Party (and they do, albeit unofficially), then serious compromise is impossible. Real world solutions must be based on real world facts, not on the world as you wish it was. They might like to believe that facts and numbers are no different from opinions, but what they like to think is irrelevant. They are wrong. And it really is that simple.
You can’t run a nation with wishful thinking.
News Roundup for 3/24/11
CONFIRMED: this ain’t much of a lock
-Headline of the day-
“CONFIRMED: Obama Locked Out of White House.”
As far as wingnut blogger Jim Hoft is concerned, it has been CONFIRMED that President Obama was locked out of the White House today. Seems he came back from Brazil earlier than expected and found a door locked.
Hahahahaha! The President of the United States, locked out of his own house! Hahahahaha! Clearly, he’s the worst president ever!. Remember, this has been CONFIRMED! CONFIRMED!!
Here’s what it looks like when the most powerful man on Earth gets locked out of his house:
He tries one door, it’s locked. He tries the other — pop, right in. This is being “locked out” in much the same way that using a pair of scissors to open a stubborn bag of chips is “starving to death.”
But never mind that, he was locked out! It’s CONFIRMED!!! (Gateway Pundit)
-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, we hear a lot about “smart bombs,” but what if there were…
Click for animation
Oh sure, go and use the word “smart” correctly… (MarkFiore.com)
“‘I’m through whining about a liberal press,’ says Sarah Palin.”
Unfortunately, this statement was made while whining about a “liberal press.” No really. Go check for yourself.
At least she admits it’s whining. (The Hill)