News Roundup for 10/26/11
Mitt Romney, shown listing the many positions he’s taken on the issues
-Headline of the day-
“Mitt Romney: Actually, I do support Ohio law.”
Oh Mittens, you’re so flippity-floppity.
Yesterday, Romney visited a GOP phonebank in Ohio, to boost the spirits of all the temps the state party had hired to pester people about the attempted repeal of a union-busting law by referendum. For the record, the Republican Party would be against the repeal, because then all the temps would probably unionize.
Anyway, while visiting this hive of feverish activity, Mittens was asked what he thought of the law. Romney instinctively sensed that someone was trying to pin him down on a position (a position, BTW, he’s already been pinned down on) and pretty much refused to answer the question. Mittens wasn’t at a phonebank that was doing get out the vote for the union-busting ballot measure to voice an opinion about it. He wasn’t interested in “particular ballot issues,” he said. And everyone wondered what the hell he was doing there then.
So this all became a big thing, with people on the right calling him a coward and people on the left calling him a scaredy-pants. Mitt was going to have to put a lid on this right pronto. While in Virginia today, he basically said, “Oh, you mean that ballot issue!”
“What I was referring to is I know there are other ballot questions there in Ohio and I wasn’t taking a position on those,” he said. “With regard to Question 2, which is the collective bargaining question, I am 110 percent behind Gov. Kasich in support of that.”
Which, of course, brings us to this:
Columbus Dispatch:
Issue 2 is getting smashed by 25 points, 57 percent to 32 percent, in Quinnipiac’s latest poll. The survey by the Connecticut university, released two weeks before the election, is the final public poll planned on the controversial law, which is on hold until voters have their say.
Yeah, Romney just came out in favor of the least popular thing since the clap. Way to pick a winner, Mittens! (Politico)
-Competing visions-
Occupy Wall Street’s counterpart isn’t the Tea Party.
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It’s a much more dangerous bunch of crazies. (Truthdig)
-Bonus HotD-
“Washington Post Illustrates Oakland Police Brutality With Cop Petting Kitty.”
No, really. (Wonkette)
News Roundup for 10/21/11
Herman Cain
-Headline of the Day-
“Herman Cain Defends 9-9-9 By Dropping One Of The 9s.”
Pizza guy Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 plan — a 9% corporate income tax, 9% personal income tax, and 9% sales tax — is the best tax plan ever devised by man. Let’s look at the advantages here; it’s simple, it’s… Ummm… Well, it’s simple. No more goofing around with tax forms looking for deductions that would bring your taxes down. It’s freakin’ awesome!
Still, Cain admitted that people at the low end of the economic scale wouldn’t do so well under his awesome plan. So no more 9-9-9 for the dirt poor. For them, it’s 9-0-9. No income taxes (just like things are now) and a new sales tax. You still pay more, but not as much more. Now shut up and stop being poor!
Of course, this doesn’t address the other problems with the plan — most notably, if you aren’t wealthy, it sucks.
Still, any step away from 9-9-9 is a step in the right direction. (Talking Points Memo)
-#OccupyYourMailbox-
Ever wonder why people sympathize with Occupy Wall Street?
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Well there ya go then… (Truthdig)
-Bonus HotD-
“Michele Bachmann’s New Hampshire Staff All Fleeing Like Hell.”
The exodus is so big that you could truthfully say that Shelly doesn’t actually have a New Hampshire campaign anymore. Bonus fun: a Bachmann appearance in San Francisco fails to attract even protesters.
She’s totally gonna be president! (Wonkette)
News Roundup for 10/10/11
Getting someplace
-Headline of the Day-
“Poll: Half the country has heard about the Occupy Wall Street protests.”
CNN is out with a good news/bad news poll. The good news is “roughly half” (51%) of the people CNN polled were aware of the Occupy Wall Street protests and the bad news is that, of them, 54% don’t have an opinion about them either way. But the bad news breaks down further as good bad news for the 99-percenters and bad bad news for the people backing the suits. CNN reports that “27% say they agree with the movement’s overall position on the financial system and social change, with 19% saying disagree with Occupy Wall Street on those issues.”
In better news for the 99-percenters, Occupy Wall Street is winning the internet by an extremely wide margin. “Those who use social media were more likely to support the goals of the movement, with a full third of those respondents saying they agreed with the group’s overall position,” reports The Hill. “Only 14 percent of social media users said they did not support the protesters.”
It’s a start. Occupy Facebook! (CNN)
-GOP consistency on display-
>
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No comment needed, I guess. (DailyKos)
-Bonus HotD-
“Almost Twice As Many People Have Heard of Occupy Wall Street As Rick Perry.”
Or, “Fun With Mix-and-Match Polling.” (Wonkette)
News Roundup for 9/28/11
For some reason, Americans don’t like these guys
-Headline of the day-
“Americans Dislike the Tea Party More Than Ever Before.”
The Tea Party is that broad cross section of ordinary Americans that stretches all the way from the audience of Rush Limbaugh to the audience of Sean Hannity. Every day people, standing up for what they believe in, which is whatever they’re told to believe in. These patriots have had to endure a lot, from listening to Breitbart speak, to being subjected to Michele Bachmann’s unblinking stare. And now there’s another hardship these average Americans must face — the dislike of the average American.
A new poll shows that just “28 percent of Americans hold favorable views of the tea party, an all-time low in the 19 months that CNN/ORC pollsters have gauged Americans’ feelings about the movement. At the same time, 53 percent of Americans think poorly of the tea party, an all-time high.”
And CNN’s not alone here. According to the report, “In a pair of Pew Research Center polls conducted in February 2010 and August 2011, disapproval of the tea party jumped from 18 percentage points; the percentage of those who said they liked the movement increased from 33 to 36 percent. Washington Post-ABC and Wall Street Journal-NBC polls also found declining support for the tea party from 2009 to 2010.”
What’s happening here is more than just familiarity breeding contempt; familiarity is breeding specific knowledge. When the TP first started, people were like, “They’re unhappy? I’m unhappy too! Good for them…” But then they started to learn what the ‘baggers were unhappy about and it was stuff like communists taking over and birth certificates and other crazy shit. People didn’t like that so much. All the “Let’s let the US go into default!” batshittery probably didn’t help much either.
So keep doing what you’re doing, ‘baggers. It’s working out great for all the people you think are your enemies. (Mother Jones)
-Comparing “scandals”-
A little perspective on a loan guarantee “scandal”:
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You’re welcome. (McClatchy)
-Bonus HotD-
“Who Dares Tell The Tea Party They Smell Like Old Gorilla Masks?”
Why people don’t like ‘baggers, Exhibit A: they have no sense of humor, take themselves way to seriously, and never miss an opportunity to play the victim card — no matter how trivial that opportunity may be. (Wonkette, with video)
News Roundup for 9/22/11
Mitt Romney
-Headline of the Day-
“Hundred Millionaire Mitt Romney Tells Crowd He, Too, Is Middle Class.”
Mittens Romney knows a thing or two about class warfare — mostly because he’s made most of his money waging it.
But that’s not what’s important now. What’s important is that you know he’s just your average middle-class Joe, who happens to have like a gazillion dollars. How does he pull this off? It’s math, dummy!
See, at a town hall event, Mittens chewed on a wheat stalk and stuck his thumbs in the bib of his overalls. He told his fellow hayseeds that he favors a tax policy that will help “those who have been hurt by the Obama economy.”
Who’s that? Mittens helpfully defined it; “And that’s the middle class,” Romney continued. “It’s not those in the low end; it’s certainly not those in the very high end. It’s for the great middle class — the 80 to 90 percent of us in this country.” So, if you’re not the 5 or 10 richest percentile or the 5 or 10 poorest percentile, you’re freakin’ Ward Cleaver and Fred Flintstone all rolled up into one neat middle class package. The guy who works at the 7-11? Middle class. Fella who works at a factory? Middle class. The rock star in the last video you watched? Most likely just middle class.
So poor Mittens is just like everyone else, just barely squeaking by on his somewhere-in-the-neighborhood-of-a-quarter-billion dollars. He gets into his Learjet one leg at a time, just like everybody else. (Wonkette)
-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, have you heard about this whole big Solyndra loan guarantee thing? It’s basically where this one solar energy company acted just like the nuclear energy industry and it’s the worst thing ever — I guess because no reactors are involved or something.
Anyway, it proves this whole “green energy” stuff is just a bunch of hooey and we should just stick with what’s working for us.
Click for animation
Next thing you know, they’ll be saying we can get free energy from the wind! Crazy treehuggers… (MarkFiore.com)
-Bonus HotD-
“McCotter drops out of race for GOP presidential nomination.”
Wait, who? (Detroit News)
News Roundup for 9/20/11
America’s Second Least Useful Pundit, After Bill Kristol
-Headline of the Day-
“Yup, moderates and independents support taxing the rich.”
If there’s one hobby you might consider taking up, it’s David Brooks avoidance. The New York Times columnist and TV talking head suffers from a really bad case of High Broderism that dictates that the only wise course for a politician — especially a Democratic politician — is straight down the center line of the interstate.
In his latest reality-challenged column, Brooks becomes very sad that President Obama has chosen a lane with his deficit reduction and job creation plans. “In his remarks Monday the president didn’t try to win Republicans to even some parts of his measures,” Brooks complains. “He repeated the populist cries that fire up liberals but are designed to enrage moderates and conservatives.”
See, when the chips are down, moderates always side with conservatives. Is there any evidence of this? Not especially, but don’t try to tell David Brooks that. It’s heresy in his Church of the Almighty Middle.
And don’t try to point out reality either. It’s not going to sink in. If Brooks hasn’t wised up by now, he’s never going to. But that doesn’t stop Greg Sargent from giving it the old college try.
“[A]s it happens, strong majorities of moderates and independents support tax hikes on the wealthy as the best way to close the deficit,” he points out and provides big poll numbers to prove it. Will taxing the wealthy “enrage” moderates? No. How do we know that? Because someone asked them!
Note to Dave: mindreading acts are unnecessary in a world where polling exists.
Seriously, the best first step you can take in understanding American politics well would be to swear to remain forever in ignorance of what David Brooks thinks. (Plum Line)
-Economics 101-
When you really think about Republican economic talking points, they don’t make a whole lot of sense.
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Which would explain why a lot of people don’t really think about them. (McClatchy)
-Bonus HotD-
“American Family Association Freaks Out Over Ice Cream Named After Testicles.”
This is a real thing. (Wonkette)
News Roundup for 9/13/11
Noted hypocritical lunatic Shelly Malkin
-Headline of the Day-
“A few more words about Koward Krugman.”
Michelle Malkin is really pissed off at Paul Krugman. You might remember that Krugman wrote a 9/11 anniversary post about how the right has snatched up 9/11 for personal and political gain. Of course, they have, but that’s beside the point — it’s poor manners to point that out and Shelly will not have it. Such things simply are not done.
So she goes off on a tirade of grievance, following the rest of the rightwing blogosphere in failing to address Krugman’s argument in any way. It’s all bluster and outrage and oh-my-god-it’s-the-worst-thing-ever, but no actual rebuttal to the claim that wingnuts have taken 9/11 as their own political totem — mostly because there is no possible rebuttal. They clearly have.
Anyhoo, you’re here for the fun, not Shelly Malkin’s failure to debate while pretending to debate. Don’t worry, it’s coming. See, Malkin calls Krugman “Koward Krugman” because, for this 9/11 rant of his, he turned off the comments to his blog.
Here’s a fun game; go to Shelly’s login page and try to register to comment. Guess what? You can’t do it. She turned off registration in 2005 and only rarely opens it up to new commenters. And, when you are able to register, your comments damned well better be along the lines of “OH MY GOD, YOU’RE SO AWESOME!!” or you’ll be banned right pronto.
So Krugman shut comments down for a day, while Shelly’s been allowing only the most fawning commenters for six freakin’ years.
I’m sorry, who’s the koward again? (Michelle Malkin)
-True patriots go splat-
Tom Toles takes on the right’s love for austerity.
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Don’t worry, it’ll spur good old American innovation; i.e., you’ll figure out how to fly before you hit the ground. (Washington Post)
-Bonus HotD-
“Fox News Cold Freaking Out Over Obama’s Use of Crappy Paper Clip.”
No, really. (Wonkette, with video)
News Roundup for 9/1/11
Turns out this is illegal
-Headline of the Day-
“Justice Department Tougher On Abortion Protesters.”
People who yell at ladies outside women’s health clinics are shocked to discover the President Barack HUSSEIN Obama isn’t as willing to look the other way as the Oh-so-Christian GWB was. See, it seems there’s a law against that sort of thing and people have been breaking it — a lot. According to the report, “Under the Freedom of Access to Clinic Entrances Act, or FACE Act, the Justice Department’s civil rights division has filed eight civil cases since the start of the Obama administration. That’s a big increase over the George W. Bush years, when one case was filed in eight years.”
The FACE basically makes it illegal to keep people from entering a clinic, but it also includes penalties for trespassing. Clinics have used the trespassing provision to create a “buffer zone” to keep the nuts away, but the Bush administration had a bad habit of not giving a fuck. Now the free ride is over.
“There’s been a substantial difference between this administration and the one immediately prior,” says Ellen Gertzog, director of security for Planned Parenthood. “From where we sit, there’s currently much greater willingness to carefully assess incidents when they occur and to proceed with legal action when appropriate.”
Now would seem to be a good time to point out another news story of the day: the US ranks 41st in the world in terms of infant mortality, which — for the record — is just awful.
Want to save some babies in real numbers? Put down the aborted fetus signs, quit the Republican Party, and become activists for real healthcare reform.
Just sayin’. (NPR)
-Moammar and the monster-
Qadaffi gets some really solid advice from a fellow human rights violator. 
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Actually, that doesn’t really seem to be working for Dick. (Truthdig)
-BonusHotD-
“Arizona GOP Fundraiser Remembers Giffords Shooting With Glock Raffle.”
Pure class… (Wonkette)
News Roundup for 8/31/11
Bitter rivalry
-Headline of the Day-
“Sarah Palin Appearance at Tea Party Rally in Iowa ‘No Longer Confirmed.’”
There was going to be a big tea party rally in Iowa Saturday. Or maybe there isn’t. Who even knows?
See, here’s what happened: Sarah Palin was going to show up for this thing, but then she found out Christine O’Donnell was going to be there too. Christine’s selling this big important book nobody wants, so she’s like all over the place lately. So Sarah sees that Christine’s on the bill and she’s all like, “No way! She’s younger and prettier and — let’s face it — crazier than I am! No way am I going to get upstaged by that witch!”
Which is totally unfair, because Christine is famously not a witch.
Anyway the ‘baggers had to boot Christine or Sarah wasn’t going to show. That was final. So they did. Or maybe they didn’t. It’s all very confusing. Sarah’s saying that the organizers have lied to her. I guess she found out that Christine was going to pop out of a cake and surprise everyone with sparklers or something while Sarah did her big dance routine. I’m guessing. I don’t have the details. Just piecing stuff together from the info I have, like Sherlock Holmes.
Of course, Sarah cancelled. And then she didn’t cancel. And then her appearance was “on hold.” She might even throw together a different shindig someplace else just to show up that snotty little witch. Who knows? It’s all very indefinite and up in the air and crazy right now. And the ‘bagger group, Tea Party of America, is already out $100,000 whether anything happens or not.
You know, it’s organizational skills like this that got us the S&P downgrade. These people couldn’t put together a peanut butter sandwich without incurring a death toll. (Wall Street Journal)
-Doh!-
GOP frontrunners as characters from The Simpsons. 
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Amazingly accurate. (Reddit)
-Bonus HotD-
“Dim Michele Bachmann Wants To Drill Everglades For Oil That Isn’t There.”
That’s right, Shelly’s energy policy is just poke holes wherever you think there might be oil and screw those crazy geologists who want to dictate to Everyday Americans where there is or isn’t oil. Science is our enemy! (Wonkette)
News Roundup for 8/25/11
The couple in happier times
-Headline of the Day-
“Condi Rice Photos Are Moammar Gaddafi’s Dictator Porn of Choice.”
One of the things about being ousted from power is that it’s a lot like dying; if you aren’t prepared for it, people are going to find some embarrassing things in your left behind stuff. In the case of Moammar G or K or Q or whatever, that means “a big ol’ catalogue of fap fuel made up of Condoleezza Rice photo scrapbooks hidden in his torture castle.”
It’s not like there weren’t clues. “I support my darling black African woman,” he said in a 2007 Al Jazeera interview. “I admire and am very proud of the way she leans back and gives orders to the Arab leaders… Leezza, Leezza, Leezza… I love her very much. I admire her, and I’m proud of her, because she’s a black woman of African origin.” Oh yeah, crack that whip, baby. Make those Arab leaders beg!
“I think I don’t need to see the photos, but bizarre and creepy are good adjectives to describe much of Gadhafi’s behavior,” said State Department spokeswoman Victoria Nuland. “It doesn’t surprise me. It’s deeply bizarre and deeply creepy, though, if it is as you described.”
To this blog’s knowledge, this is the first time in history the State Department commented on photos stashed under a guy’s mattress. (Wonkette, MSNBC)
-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, Little Suzie Newsykins is back and she’s here to tell us what she learned on her summer vacation. Yay! 
Click for animation
I think there might be something wrong with Suzie… (MarkFiore.com)
-Bonus HotD-
“Cantor Spox: If There’s Hurricane Damage, Costs Will Have To Be Paid For With Spending Cuts.”
Ooh look! A brand new hostage! (Talking Points Memo)
